Mega Evolution No. 26: Garchomp

oh, screw me...

Remember how I said Garchomp was kinda cool, but overdesigned and messy? Well, when Gamefreak read that post (and you know they read NAPACE let's be real here) they must have mis-translated it and said that I thought it didn't have enough spikes, blades, or patches of color.

Because christ if they didn't do just that. They took a design that was already ratcheted up to 11 and cranked it up a few more notches. It's at 14 or so right now. They actually had to get a second amp to measure it on, like how when you're counting on your fingers and go above 10 and have to start using toes.

I really don't know where to start with this one. No matter where I look, something inane and unsafe is happening. Garchomp was already a safety hazard, but Mega Garchomp wouldn't be allowed within forty feet of a public building. It has 20 spikes, that's right, 20 of 'em. All along its chest, arms, and legs. Some of them are red! just like it's gigantic hand-scythes.

Don't forget the head, doing its best Battleship Yamato impression, a shark tail sticking out as a weird reminder of what it once was, when the world made sense, and random lines just thrown in for good measure. Oh, and don't worry, it has a splotch of yellow on its belly still. Jesus.

Mega Garchomp is what happens when you give a Godzilla movie an actual budget, it's like two Gigans fused together and mixed up with a Great White Shark and a Piranha. I can't over-exaggerate how crazy this thing is, because it will always be exactly that crazy.


Overall: 14/10