Team Aqua of New Hoenn

Let's check out Neo Aqua! They also got a redesign, and rebranding.

Well, they're certainly busier, that's for sure. Also looking rough, with those frayed shorts. Except they're wearing tights, and silly boots. Hey, don't those shoes look like the ones Neo Magma wears? Did they buy them at the same store? I like everything until you get below the end of the pants/shorts, I guess. Also - they're brown now! Either the whole team got a tan, or this Magma-vs-Aqua conflict has more racial tension than I previously assumed.

Grunts: 6/10



The admins are completely different. They're wearing what appears to be high-performance wetsuits, except Shelly has "fashionable" holes in hers, and Matt appears to have torn his. Dammit Matt, those things cost money! Also how the ever-loving shit did you get a reverse tan of the Aqua logo on your chest!? And what's happening around the edges of your hairline? Christ, Matt, you're a mess. Did you seriously pump so many steroids your chest and arms exploded out of your suit? I can still see it hanging on around your neck and hands there.

But Shelly, I'm not done with you. I miss the old red-head look, not gonna lie. This Empress Hancock style isn't working for me, nor is the random blue streaks. And at least Matt had the decency to put his logo on his chest, but yours is just lost in the design. If you're supposed to look like pirates, neither of you really succeeded.

Shelly: 2/10
Matt: 1/10



Now we come to the bossman himself, and he's wearing a golden anchor around his neck, like he's Flava Flav or something. And again, we see the confusion - high-tech wetsuit, but a weird frayed skirt-cape? And putting back on the bandanna, as if it's salvageable at this point. Man, this whole team redesign was a mistake.

Archie: 3/10

I like the basic idea here, I think - Magma becomes totalitarian and super-strict, almost Nazi-esque, while Aqua becomes wild and chaotic, like mercenary pirates. That works to differentiate the teams even more, but damn if the designs for Aqua did not pay off. Busy, confused, they're just ugly and only the grunts actually look piratical. Matt certainly looks "wild", but he also looks like he's lost his goddamn mind.


Overall: 2/10