Galarian Yamask

Return the slab...

I've always felt like Yamask and Cofagrigus could be Ghost/Ground, because they're Egyptian mummy adjacent and when you think Egypt, you think sand. Same with Dusklops, too. So making a regional variant that covers those bases seems like a natural step, rather than a weird shake-up.

With that said, the direction they chose to go was making Yamask carry around pieces of a clay tablet, instead of anything sandy or pharaonic. So I'm not sure where that leaves us, it's a sideways move rather than an upgrade. Black, Red, and Gold has been changed out for Black, Purple, Red, and Grey, and those are also cool colors.

I like the concept of a bunch of ghosts inhabiting different shards of an ancient slate, who all come together to break a curse or possibly end the world. It would have been cool if the Yamasks held different pieces then, instead of all getting the same tail chunk.

Overall: 6/10

No. 866: Mr Rime

 No rhyme or reason to this disaster.

If I was British, I would be offended somehow. I don't think a dapper little dipshit, tap-dancing and twirling a cane, is the sort of image I'd want to project to the world. Mr. Rime seems to have forgotten that Mr. Mime was supposed to have clown hair, and instead has developed wings of a sort. Attached to his hat, which is also part of his head, naturally. Because everything must be a nightmare.

I'm not even going to comment on his Poirot-ass mustache, or his icy clown shoes that must leave him slip-sliding all over the goddamn floor, but I do need to question what in the hell is going on with his stomach. Is that a second face, trying to form? It looks a little bit like Mime Jr. Does Mr. Rime sprout Mime Jrs. from his stomach like a sponge, reproducing via budding? That's horrific.

Overall: 1/10

Galarian Mr. Mime

 "You can't shoot a dancing man."

What's the only thing worse than a mime? A tap-dancing mime. Holy shit I hate this Pokemon on a conceptual level. I will admit that he's got a fine color scheme, but that's the only concession I'll be making today. I hate his nose that looks like the nasal cavity in a skull. I hate his skinny arms that look like easily-snapped twigs. I hate his big clonking clogger shoes. I hate his stupid dumbass dance. I hate this Pokemon and I wish it never existed.

Overall: 1/10

No. 865: Sirfetch'd

shuba shuba shuba 

After truly learning the ways of the sword... er, leek, Sirfetch'd gains a noble countenance and heroic gleam in his eye. Truly, this duck has become the parfit gentil knight. I just wish that Don Patch Sword was a little bit smaller?

like, Galarian Farfetch'd actually seemed to have better proportions with his oversized weapon - it was big, but like Timburr's 2x4 you can imagine him swinging it around with all his might. But Sirfetch'd sword is more like a lance, and with those tiny legs I can't believe he gets any leverage on that thing. I think it's fun and cool to have a big weapon, but I've always been a nitpicky bastard and I think it ought to be maybe 70% as big? Here, look at this:

idk somehow that just looks more balanced to me. Anyway, Sirfetch'd is pretty cool even with his big ol' leek. I'd trust him to save me, if I were a damsel in distress.

Overall: 7/10

Galarian Farfetch'd

It was too big to be called a sword... Massive, thick, heavy, and far too rough. Indeed, it was like a stalk of fresh leek.

One of the best things about these regional forms is that they get to re-cast obscure Pokemon that otherwise have no purpose. Farfetch'd was just one more Normal/Flying, but as a Fighting bird it stands out!

I dig the personality on display, with its manly furrowed brows and eyes that say "heh... my sword has cut another worthless thing."

Do not fuck with this duck.

Overall: 8/10

No. 864: Cursola

May those who harm the reef come to ruin and suffering! Heed the curse of the coral!

Heck yeah, this is even more gonzo than the prior evolution. Now it's broken out of its mortal husk and exists as a freaky coral tree, with its core looking honestly shocked by the whole turn of events, as the ectoplasm shell grimaces in netherworldly anguish.

It's part coral, part smoking incense, part vengeful spirit, all awesome.

Honestly I didn't come here today expecting to like Cursola so much but damn I forgot how weird and cool this thing is! I dig how the remains of its old form act as an anchor, but at the same time it looks like it's in in the constant state of exploding into a mushroom cloud of phantasm.

Overall: 10/10

Galarian Corsola

Don't step on the reef, y'all. it's a living thing, too.

Aside from making me face the grim reality of ecological destruction, Galarian Corsola is kinda neat. Turning Corsola into a Ghost is very off-the-wall, and I honestly like it more as just a weird spooky dude than literally a dead reef.

Despite just being Corsola, but sad and ashen, I rather like it. too bad this wasn't in Sword, because I definitely would've sought it out.

Overall: 7/10

No. 863: Perrserker

MY LOVE FOR YOU IS LIKE A TRUCK
PERRSERKER

Fortunately, by not being Persian with a beard, Perrserker is free to actually be kinda sick. I don't feel tricked by the beard anymore, and the larger body balances it better. So I'm free to appreciate the sharp teeth, cool helmet & horns, and the fact that this is a fuzzy Steel-type. Which doesn't happen often, usual Steel is reserved for armored mofos and robots.

We also can't review this line without giving a shout-out to that time in Pokemon: The First Movie, when Team Rocket dressed up as vikings and the English dub made a joke about the Minnesota Vikings.

Does that help Perrserker's rating? Is is possible they were remembering that obscure gag when they designed him? Not really, but hey. More important is those neat Wolverine claws.

Overall: 7/10

Galarian Meowth

Gee Meowth, home come your mom lets you have TWO regional forms? 

He looks like one of Heathcliff's less reputable friends, and probably smells like rotten sardines. I thought he was great at first, until we saw the 3D model and realized this little furball isn't entirely covered by shaggy fur - that's just his gross beard! He's got a regular Meowth body behind it!

and honestly, that soured me on the whole thing. This isn't a regional form, it's just an unwashed Meowth with poor hygiene.

Overall: 2/10

Pokemon Legends Arceus has Restored me to Life

Oh baby. This is it. This is what I've been waiting for. This is the game that I wanted Sword & Shield to be - open world environments, but still with turn-based battles. It's clearly early footage, but I'm so excited I'm going to pretend I like Sinnoh. I'm also going to imagine that the final release won't have frame-rate issues.

This announcement got me so hype I'm actually gonna return to the blog and finish the generation!