No. 154: Meganium

And then the brontosaurus stuck its fool head through the giant flower, and wore it like a ruff.

Man, what happened to that leaf? Now we have antennae? What the hell? Where did those come from?

Whatever. Meganium is still okay, but it doesn't have the cute of a first-stage, or the epic of a final-stage. It feels a little plain.

I must admit that I like the progression of leaves to buds to flowers that Meganium finishes, but it's not enough to make it a great Pokemon.

Overall: 5/10

No. 153: Bayleef

That's a really cool looking leaf right there..

I mean, that leaf looks pretty badass. It's all sharp and stuff, with a neat circular notch in it. But I'm not sure why green bread is stuck all around Bayleef's neck.

Aside from the leaf-sword, however, there is not much to Bayleef. It looks a little awkward, as is common among middle-evolutions, similar to how the human species looks its most awkward during the Middle School years.

Screw Middle School, seriously.

Overall: 6/10

No. 152: Chikorita

Second Generation, here we come!!

Aww, look at this cutie. A pear you can pet!

Chikorita loves Ash in the anime, and is very possessive about him, which kinda reminds me of my cat. She's all about the cuddling.

so I'll be bold - Chikorita is a better starter than Bulbasaur.

Overall: 10/10

The worst Gen 1 pokemon

Man, these guys just suck.

5. Dragonite
4. Seel
3. Tentacool
2. Parasect
1. Pidgey

There seem to be two types of horrible Pokemon: those that are uninspired and basically just a regular animal, and those that are ugly and stupid and lame and I hate them.

But at least the ugly ones tend to be rare, while the uninspired ones tend to be the most common.

Pidgey, I am looking right in your feathery face right now.

The best Gen 1 Pokemon

Someone asked for me to rank my Top Ten 10/10 Pokemon, so here they are.

1. Haunter
2. Scyther
3. Machamp
4. Pinsir
5. Blastoise
6. Magmar
7. Charizard
8. Machop
9. Abra
10. Hitmonlee


HOWEVER, this is only the 1st Generation Top Ten. There are quite a few Pokemon in the subsequent generations that would have made it into my all-time Top Ten, which will probably have to wait until I've covered every singe generation.

What about you guys? What are you favorite 1st Gen Pokemon?

1st Gen Summary

Man, done with the first gen already. whew.

People always say that the 1st was the best, but honestly I don't know sometimes. There are a lot of classic amazing Pokemon, but also quite a few stupid wastes of space. For every Blastoise, there is a Seel. For Every Pinsir, there is a Paras.

So, how did this gen do? According to my calculations, it averaged 6.2/10. Is that what you expected? I think it's about right. If everything was perfectly balanced, it would come out to be 5.0/10, yes?

So the 1st generation exceeds that, and is in fact above average.

But it remains to be seen whether it is in fact significantly better when compared to the other generations.

I'm gonna do a few more filler bits before starting the 2nd gen, so bear with me. And thanks for bearing with me so far.

No. 151: Mew

Just when did you start thinking the 1st generation went from 1 to 150?

It's Mew! The lovable mystery Pokemon, and the inspiration for Mewtwo. She's as cute as a button, and NO, YOU CAN'T FRIGGING FIND HER NATURALLY IN THE GAME.

Even if you use strength on the truck.

But so I remember trying to get a picture of Mew in Pokemon Snap. man, that was an ordeal. Why so shy, Mew? You hide in a bubble, and gurgle cute nothings at us, and then when we hit you with apples, you fly away... such a tease...

But Mew is really nice, and in my mind, is the definitive "cute legendary". Screw Celebi, Jirachi, and Manaphy. They are nothing compared to the pure bubblegum sweetness that is Mew.

Also, Mew gets points for being the first truly elusive Pokemon that made it maddeningly difficult to truly Catch them All. Because when your friend had all 150, but you were that lucky bastard who somehow got to an event and you had 151, that felt delicious.

Overall: 10/10

No. 150: Mewtwo

Here he is, the big bad himself. Mr. 150.

Mewtwo is the closest thing the Pokemon games have ever had to a final boss, and does he deliver?

Hell to the yes.

Mewtwo is a psychotic psychic with the voice of Dan Green and the temperament of an omnicidal maniac. When he was created to be the world's strongest Pokemon, everything went horribly right.

Mewtwo is a badass son of a bitch who can turn your brain into spaghetti with a glare, and conjure up world-drowning storms with a wave of his hand. He wears badass armor at one point, but then says "screw it" and wreck's Giovanni's shit before doing his own thing.

Which is either creating an army of clones to rule a perfect world, or sitting around in a cave, depending one whether you're watching the anime or playing the game.

Special mention must be given to manga Mewtwo, who wields a battle spoon and is bound by his DNA to Blaine, the Cinnnibar Gym Leader.

Yes, this really happens.


anyway, just what sort of animal is Mewtwo supposed to be? I've heard cat, but he doesn't really look it at all. Not his ears, but his head kinda looks a little feline. Also, what's up with that second neck? That always looked really distinctive to me.

I think that's part of why Mewtwo is so threatening: he looks like he might have been a recognizable creature at some point, but he's been twisted and warped into something else. He totally looks like a god-tier lab rat, and finally capturing him is the feater in everyone's Pokemon cap.

Overall: 10/10

No. 149: Dragonite

oh shit just look at this derpy son of a bitch

Okay, no. This is not what the pinnacle of "dragon" looks like. This is what you get when you take the Dragon Tails dragons and tell them to introduce you to their Japanese cousin. Dragonite sucks ass.

Dratini to Dragonair is a logical progression. But for Dragonite, they changed the color, completely changed the skeletal structure, changed the head-wings into antennae, and gave it the derpiest grin this side of Herpingsville.

I really wanted some sort of giant majestic sky snake dragon, terrible and beautiful at the same time. But instead, I got some sort of sing-a-long reject.

at one point Dragonite even carried some mail. What the hell. That is stupid and lame and Dragonite is a slap in the face of dragons everywhere.

Overall: 1/10

No. 148: Dragonair

ANOTHER silky smooth majestic beast!

I sure hope that this trend continues!

anyway, Dragonair is also pretty nice-looking. It's a bigger Dratini, with bigger wings, a slightly bigger horn, and beads on its tail. Also it can fly, and control the weather.

That's so crazy. Imagine if you had one, you could just make it be sunny all the time, or have snow in July. That wouldn't spit in the face of nature and cause butterfly-effect-level catastrophe in China.

Dragonair is one of the few Pokemon that I think I would describe as "beautiful". It is elegance personified.

Overall: 10/10