Wednesday Ramble

Haven't done one of these in a while, but let's talk about that new Pokemon game, huh?

First, let me say how glad I am that the environments aren't stuck on a grid like Let's Go Pikachu/Eevee. People said they were only like that because it was a retro remake, and I think that's still a bullshit reasoning, but at least it hasn't infected the mainline series. Galar looks like the terrain has contours and gradients, it's an extension of Sun/Moon's aesthetic.

With that said, I'm still disappointed Gamefreak has once again refused to take that next step in terms of presentation of the world. The camera appears locked at a fixed angle again, and you'll be funneled through clear routes. I'm not saying Pokemon needs to become Breath of the Wild and turn into a completely open-ended game that tosses you into the world with no direction, but I do think it's about damn time the games stepped up to where Ocarina of Time was 20 years ago.

Pokemon Gen 8 Starters revealed

Pokemon's coming home.



So they revealed Pokemon Sword & Shield today, and you can turn to more reputable sites for the juicy details. I'm just here to give my first thoughts on the new starters.

Grookey looks like a rascal, we've had a grass monkey before (twice if you count lemurs as monkeys) and I loved it, so here's hoping he evolves into something cool!

Scorbunny looks like an Olympic mascot, or something. He's a footballer hooligan, and will probably be yet another Fire/Fighter. But that's because it's a combo that works, so.

Sobble is the surprised Pikachu meme. He's got personality, at least. We've had water amphibians before, but I like salamanders, so I'm excited to see what he turns into.

You might notice that my take on all of these is basically "I wonder what the final evolution will be", and that's because I care about those a LOT more than the base forms! None of these look offensively bad to me, though they all look like Fakemon. But of course, I've thought that about every new generation since 5, so hey.


Which one would you pick?

Beta No. 227: Electygre

The tiger

He destroyed his cage

Yes

YES

The tiger is out

Look, Electygre is another very good boy. But I think the sprite is unfinished - where are his stripes? Aside from that, there's not much difference from Tigrette. Electygre is just bigger. So while this line would 100% be on my team in a hypothetical Beta Johto run, I'm gonna have to dock a point here.


Overall: 9/10

Beta No. 226: Tigrette

anyone else remember that Texaco U.S. Olympic Animals commercial?


I think we can all agree that this good round boy is our collective son.

I mean really, what more do you want? He's a sparky tiger orb, that's perfect and I love him. If I was in a bad mood I might say that the lightning bolt on his belly is redundant, because his coloring and zig-zag tail already clearly sell the "Electric" theme, but I'm not gonna do my boy like that. He deserves the world, and then some.

Overall: 10/10

Beta No. 225: Ghift

Twice now, the Pokegods have given me an opportunity to review Delibird on Christmas.

Twice now, I have missed my opportunity. We at NAPACE have no excuse - we are simply lazy.


So, beta-Delibird was named Ghift, and looked even more overtly like a lil' santaman. A clear hat and beard, and adorable heart tattoo above its groin? hmm. I can see why that was changed.

maybe I should also point out that Ghift's sack  bag is connected to his body, this time around. People have told me Delibird's sack  bag is connected as well, and sure enough the photographic evidence supports that theory, but I trust my own misconstrued biases and perceptions over "truth" or anything dumb like that. Speaking of perceptions, it's weird to talk about a bird's sack like that. I should change that to bag. I'm going to go do that now.

All that weirdness aside, I can dig Ghift. Delibird is the superior name, and the fluffy beard is better, but maybe a fusion of the two would bring us the santa-bird we've believed in all along.


Overall: 6/10

Beta No. 224: Bomseaker

YO who is this good boy?

I want to meet him. I want to learn more about him. I want to know his name. Bomseaker? Dope, I'm sold.

While we might like some of the designs, it's unfortunately true that most of these beta-mons have had conservative typings, which is no surprise given where Gamefreak's head was at the time. There wasn't really an impetus to fill out the obscure niches, or "play it fair" between the types, hence why Ghosts had to wait until Gen 5 to get their fair shake.

But this! This!! Fire/Water, a type so bold and controversial it hasn't been done yet in the official games! And a seal that balances a flaming ball on its nose is exactly the sort of coked-up nonsense that I love to see. I don't know why he's "Bomseaker", is that ball explosive? Is he a bomb-sniffing seal? Who cares, he's awesome!


Overall: 10/10

Beta No. 222: Bellmit

Here Comes Stupid!

Imagine catching a Bellsprout, evolving it into a Weepinbell, and then voluntarily choosing to evolve it into Bellmit instead of Victreebel. Couldn't be me. This dude looks like a bunch of rotten bananas. Or maybe a mandragora that got hit with an an ugly spell.



Although I'll admit - this artwork does him a lot of help! Altering the proportions and making the legs more... "leggy" really turns Bellmit from a piece of shit into something approaching decency! Honestly, I could buy this guy as an evolution of Bellsprout. It's weird to go back to limbs and stuff after Weepinbell, is the problem. But I think I've talked myself into kinda-sorta-liking Bellmit after all, imagine that. If they'd just split the line earlier (and used this artwork, the original sprite still sucks ass) then maybe it could've worked!


Overall: 5/10