Thursday, July 19, 2012

No. 474: Porygon-Z

DISC READ ERROR: THIS POKEMON IS SHITTY. PRESS ANY KEY TO CONTINUE


The original Porygon was like N64 graphics. Porygon2 was like Gamecube graphics. Porygon-Z is like... something? I've heard people say its like it got a virus and shit, but that's pretty stupid if you ask me. How is that an evolution, an improvement? an alternate evolution path from Porygon, resulting in a guy whose vertices are all out of order and his planes aren't drawing properly, collision glitches everywhere, that would be freaking awesome.

But I don't see that here. Porygon-Z looks like Porygon2 just got up and started waving his arms in the air (like he just don't care). And what's the Z for, "Zounds, this Pokemon is stupid"?

Again, I have to ask why this even exists. Wouldn't the next logical step be for a Porygon3D, that somehow is even more 3D than it already is? Wait, that sounds stupid also. I like my alternate-path idea, and I also like the idea of leaving Porygon the hell alone. Just like the virus I got that crashed my computer a few years ago, no one asked for Porygon-Z. Only one question remains - When will Porygon GT come out?


Overall: 2/10

4 comments:

  1. Interesting fact, in some translations of revelation they state that the number of the beast is actually 616 instead of 666. The letter in Binary that corresponds with this value is a slashed, lower case I. Porygon-z is the same shape as that letter. The spike coming out of the head on porygon-z implies that it is crucified. The arms could be interpreted as being nailed to a cross and drooping. The single leg also implies that both legs are together, like how a person is crucified. One could argue that the reason that its eyes are that way is because z is filled with an evil spirit, and it's being crucified on the letter of the beast. If that's the case, we could interpret that porygon-z is the anti-christ

    ReplyDelete
  2. Also z is the final letter of the alphabet. It would have worked better if it had been called porygon-Ω(omega) since he is probably the antic-christ.

    ReplyDelete
  3. leave porygon-z alone
    I like porygon-z and would be glad to have one in real life
    if I had a porygon-z I would never let it go away from me
    my perfect pokemon team would have a porygon-z, a rotom, a zoroark, gothitelle, gardevior and a ditto

    ReplyDelete
  4. Porygon GT is non canon. Porygon Super is the real evolution.

    ReplyDelete